At around 4:15 PM today, I felt exactly like a Presidential candidate with a serious skeleton in the closet. And I'm not talking a "controversial pastor"/"pregnant daughter" skeleton. I'm talking about one of those illict, truck stop men's room scandals. The kind that not only ruins your campaign, but also any hope of even being elected Dog Catcher in the forseeable future. And I realized that I needed to make a choice. Do I hide and hope the news never breaks, then deny, deny, deny if it does break? Or do I stand up, like a man, and address the people who this news may hurt, hoping to salavage my career? The choice was clear...
Readers of the Gospel According to Mikey (all six of you), I stand before you today embarrassed and ashamed. We all make mistakes in our youth, yet youth is no excuse for the transgression I am guilty of. I will be perfectly frank with you and I hope that you will find it in your hearts to forgive me and accept me as your kind of funny, way too into himself sports blogger...
Before the beginning of this NFL season, I made a Super Bowl Prediction. I chose the San Diego Chargers to represent the AFC...a pick many others made, a pick I am not ashamed to admit. It may look bleak now, but it pales in comparsion to the sin I committed with my NFC prediction. Yes readers, I am on record as stating that the Seattle Seahawks will represent the National Football Conference in the Super Bowl.
I realize now the tragic error of my ways, but of course, hindsight is 20/20. I know this fact may frighten some of you...maybe even make you doubt that I have any cognitive knowledge of sport at all. I do not want to stand before you and make excuses, but how was I to know that the receiving corp would be made up of the Walking Wounded and players whose prime was in Pop Warner? How was I to know Matt Hasselbeck, once a trusted and beloved quarterback, recieved a football talent transfusion from his brother Tim? Excuses, however, will not fix the wrong. They will not erase the shame. They will not rebuild the trust we once shared as blogger and reader.
But rest assured my friends, I have seen the error of my ways. I realize now that I was wrong. The Seattle Seahawks have wronged me. They have wronged you too. I hope that all of us together can join hands and build toward tomorrow. A better tomorrow. A tomorrow where quaterbacks complete passes. A tomorrow where the recievers being thrown to belong in the league they are currently in. A tomorrow where tackles are made, points are scored, cheers are heard. And the first step to that tomorrow is forgiveness. Allow me to rebuild your trust. Allow me to be your sports blogger, and I promise you, I will never lead you astray again. I am deeply sorry for the past but it is time to use the present to build for the future. Thank you, loyal readers. God Bless America.
Phew...I think that went well...Hopefully tomorrow, we'll begin again with my plan for the Mets...It'll do the campaign good to move away from the "football" issue and focus on baseball, something its clear I know something about...
*ring ring*
Hello?....WHAT?!? How? Who?!? MAKE IT GO AWAY!....WHATEVER IT TAKES, ANY MEANS NECESSARY! No! No! I can't issue a statement. The campaign is already reeling for the Seahawks debacle, the last thing we need is the American people to know that I picked the Mariners to win the AL West and play in the ALCS!....Alright, take care of it.
*click*
How do these Presidential candidates deal with it.
Until tomorrow, monkeys.
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2 comments:
Should have picked the pats *rigs blog*
Yeh The Seahawks are EMBARRASSED.. I really think the NFL is so wide open right now.. especially in the NFC.. I mean right now the two best teams are clearly the Titans and the Giants. I really believe the Titans have the best D i seen since the 01 Ravens.. I mean I want to see the Giants play a legit team.. I mean they played the redskins the first game which was exactly what it was THE FIRST GAME the redskins didnt know what they were doing on Offense especially and It was Zorn's first game. I think he did a real nice job turning them around. But other then that they played the Rams 0-4 Bengals 0-5 and Seahawks 1-3.. I mean its not biased its just legitmitly i want to see them play a good team but they are still the Champs and best team in the NFL until beaten. Eagles disappoint me I seriously think Reid needs to leave and truthfully i never felt that way ever before.. Hey i wanted to know your thoughts on how the NLCS will go??
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